When Eyecandy is too much


So I was bored out of my mind last night and was re-watching some old stuff I had laying around, and I got to thinking about some of the "eye-candy" we see in popular media.

I'm talking about the Seven of Nines, or the babes in chain-mail bikinis in video games, and why they annoy the holy shit out of me.

Don't get me wrong, hot is hot, and I'm a fan of a hot chick as much as the next guy, but having a hot chick dressed in almost nothing just to have a hot chick dressed in almost nothing is ... dum da da da! immersion breaking.

One thing that always got me was for example Troy on Star Trek TNG, she's a Commander on the federation flag ship... walking around in a skin tight body suit... Yea I know that in Trek Starfleet isn't really a military organisation, however, Uniforms serve several purposes, and there is a reason beyond the military utility as to why they exist.

They espouse uniformity (hence uniforms), a sense of belonging to something larger then yourself, they encourage a group or unit identity, be that a charity group like the Salvation Army, or the real Army. By being out of uniform she sends the implicit message that she isn't part of the group, that she is somehow above the group, not something you'd think a shrink would want to do.

It's just as bad, if not worse, in video games, take for example the ever present chain-mail bikinis you see in every fantasy game, they offer no protection, use it's a game, yes it's fantasy set in a world of magic and elfs and unicorns, but ffs that just means we're already working hard to keep our heads in the game, no need to needlessly break immersion just to have some T&A around.

As I said earlier, I'm not very PC, so I don't really care about any of the "it's offensive to women" bullshit (when those coke ads with the shirtless guy gets pulled off TV then they can talk, until then STFU) that gets thrown around, I'm against it on a more practice ground, it doesn't suit the story, if you've got a hooker in the game, by all means have her in next to nothing, but some tough warrior lugging around a sword bigger then my leg, she knows better.

Oh and what's up with the boobs on aliens, you've got reptiles with fucking tits... Jesus. You know what purpose breaths serve right? the feeding of young, the only reason men have them is we're a genetic modification of the female form, that's it, sure we may like to look at them, but the only real reason we have them is to feed kids. Reptiles don't do it that way, birds don't do it that way, or fish, or anything other then mammals (hence why breasts are called mammary glands).

So when I see a sci-fi series with a hot chick painted green with scales with huge freaking knockers I just want to go "ugg...". If they evolved from reptiles chances are they'd feed their young via other means, if they don't just go out and eat someone else's kids a few hours after hatching.... yea that hot reptile chick wont have the same parts as you either, sorry to say.

Okay now I'm just ranting... where was I...

Oh yea, I really wish more shows would have women dressed similarly to how they would dress in a real world situational analogue. It doesn't mean dress them in a burlap sack, after all a woman can be hot in conventional clothing or uniforms, after all if all we wanted to see was titties we've got the internet for that, it's the allure of what's under the clothes that gets us, show a little make us think about the rest.

Anyway I find chicks in uniforms mega hot.

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